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Things aren’t always what they seem

By Father Dennis Meinen
View from the scooter

 ‘It makes no sense to work for pay when you can work for me for free!”

One of the ladies from our apartments was dropping off some rolls with raisins in them and I sadly replied that I had to do dishes.  

Well, guess what happened?  This queen “farmer’s wife” took over the kitchen right away and did the dishes, an action the chaplain was pleased (relieved) with. If you knew her you would know she talks with her hands. She was “double talking” (hands and lips) when she was doing the dishes.

Unfortunately, she was cleaning the knives….I never had a closer shave! She came closer to my scooter to apologize `when she rested her hand on my direction/speed control. ONCE AGAIN I had a close shave in the form of a wheelie experience. (In vehicle acrobatics, a wheelie is a trick where the front wheel or wheels come off the ground due to an excessive amount of torque being powered to the rear wheel or wheels. Wheelies are usually associated with motorbikes.)

Some say a wheelie is a stunt where a bicycle or scooter vehicle is ridden while standing only on its rear wheel or wheels. Rest assured, it wasn’t a stunt. It was from a double-talking-dish-washing-retired farmer’s wife.

 Or, how about this? A young man on a scooter was shopping in a supermarket when he noticed a little old lady following him around. If he stopped, she stopped. Furthermore she kept staring at him.  She finally overtook him at the checkout, and she turned to him and said, "I hope I haven't made you feel ill at ease; it's just that you look so much like my late son."

He answered, "That's okay." "I know it's silly, but if you'd call out 'Good bye, Mom' as I leave the store, it would make me feel so happy."

She then went through the checkout, and as she was on her way out of the store, the man called out, "Goodbye, Mom." The little old lady waved and smiled back at him.
Pleased that he had brought a little sunshine into someone's day, he went to pay for his groceries.

"That comes to $121.85," said the clerk. "How come so much? I only bought 5 items." The clerk replied, "Yeah, but your Mother said you'd be paying for her things, too."

Bet you thought this was going to be a tear jerker. Don't always trust Little Old Ladies! It’s safe to trust a double-talking-dish-washing-retired farmer’s wife though.