Research impacts marriage prep

By RENEE WEBB, Globe editor
Posted February 13, 2003

The Catholic Church attempts to cover all of the bases in its marriage preparation programs in order to ensure that marriages get off to the best possible start.

With that in mind, the Office of Faith Formation in the Diocese of Sioux City stays abreast of studies and research relating to marriage and preparation for the sacrament.

"When the church decided to require a certain amount of marriage preparation, there are reasons for it," said Bev Hurni, director of family ministries for the diocese. "The research proves it."

As there are fewer divorces among Catholics, she pointed out that many Protestant churches are now working on marriage mentor programs that are similar to the Catholic Church's Sponsor Couple.

A few years ago, noted Hurni, several churches came together in Sioux City for a community marriage agreement. Diocesan personnel met with several Protestant ministers and a Jewish rabbi to formulate this agreement that focused on requirements for marriage preparation.

"They were very interested in having us share what we have been doing because the Catholic Church has been at it longer than others," she said.

She pointed out that a 1995 study by the Center for Marriage and Family at Creighton University titled, Marriage Preparation in the Catholic Church: Getting it Right, identified some topics that were added to marriage preparation programs in the Diocese of Sioux City.

For example, the study identified that couples wanted more information as to how to juggle dual careers.

The study included information gathered from couples who were wed from one to eight years. They were asked what, in their marriage preparation, prepared them for their early years of marriage.

"They said it was most helpful when marriage preparation dealt with the five C's - communication, commitment, conflict resolution, children and church," noted Hurni. The sixth C that needed better representation was careers.

The study also concluded that marriage prep was most beneficial when it included both married couples and clergy working together as a team. Those who were part of the study said that they neither liked it as well nor found it as helpful when only clergy or married couples were involved in the preparation.

Along with being more effective preparation, she pointed out that most pastors and/or deacons see value in being part of the process because it helps them get to know the couple before presiding at their wedding and builds bonds for the future.

Some surprising information came from another Creighton study, Ministry to Interchurch Marriages.

"The research showed that when people enter an interchurch marriage, down the road both are more likely to become inactive because of how hard it is to be active in your faith life when your partner isn't involved in it with you," said Hurni. "Those couple who are able to negotiate the differences and find areas where they can support one another rather than working against one another are able to be successful."

Interchurch marriages are addressed in marriage prep.

She said studies show that the divorce rate drops significantly when couples share the same faith, practice their faith and pray together. Another study found that couples who co-habitate have a higher divorce rate. More studies are being conducted in this area.

Findings such as these, noted Hurni, can attest to the importance of couples discussing assorted issues and priorities before the wedding along with practicing good communication skills in the marriage.