"True Love Waits" arrives in Denison

By KATIE LEFEBVRE, Globe staff writer
Posted November 21, 2002

DENISON/CARROLL - High school students from Carroll led a program called "True Love Waits" for seventh and eighth graders at St. Rose of Lima School in Denison.

"True Love Waits" is a Biblically-based chastity program for teens who live and believe in a life of chastity. It is presented by teens to teens.

"It is by teens to their peers on the topics of love, sexuality, and commitment," said Kathy Steffen. She and her husband, Scott, help guide the students.

When the group from Carroll went to Denison, they presented the program to approximately 45 students. The presenters included Kari Gehling (freshman), Carolyne Hall (sophomore), Eric Joneson (junior), Kari Koster (junior), Kyle Reisberg (senior), Nicki Nigl (senior), Jessie Gehling (senior) and Amy Baughman (senior).

"I think it gives the students who are involved in facilitating and leading an opportunity to evangelize without even knowing what they are doing and teaching their peers about a very important topic," said Kathy Steffen. "They gain self-confidence and build their own self-esteem while helping others."

The presenters used a variety of methods to keep the attention and incorporate their message at the same time. They had music, games, a video segment and a snack break.

"The biggest message is that unlike everything we hear in our world today that music, television and everything around us, even peer pressure says that we are free to do whatever we want to do, but in reality God calls us to be pure and to treat our bodies as a gift," said Kathy Steffen. "We are to wait to be sexually active until we are married."

To start off the program, Scott Steffen introduces the group and the program and then lets them take over.

"A couple of the students on the team talk about personal things that are related to the topic," said Kathy Steffen.

For example, one student talked about their friend that had just recently broken up in their relationship because it was more infatuation than true love. She was only 16 and it is not the time to make the commitment. They talked about the need to be there to support her because the situation was not a friendly break up, commented Kathy Steffen. Being a support to someone is important.

"I think it is an important message that needs to be put out there," said Jessie Gehling. "To wait until marriage to have sex."

Another person gave the example that she is dating someone who became a father at 17 and is now 19. They talked about aspect of dating someone who already has a child and how that effects the relationship.

"Who else is all involved?" said Kathy Steffen. "It's not a couple making a relationship first, it is a couple and the families that they are already plus the ex-girlfriend, spouse, whatever it may be."

There was one person who volunteered to give a witness without being asked. The person talked about her story of being a teen mom and the reality of what really happened in her life.

"I get a better understanding of what other kids think and their ideas on the situation," said Jessie Gehling. "It feels good to know that they are listening to you and that if they actually listen to you, that you are helping them."

The students from Carroll presented the program for the first time to the junior class in Carroll as part of a confirmation retreat last spring. They then decided to do it as part of the religious education program in Carroll.

The program has incorporated teens talking to each other with the message of abstinence. The group from Carroll plans to continue sending the message by presenting the "True Love Waits" program.