Parents are primary catechists
By RENEE WEBB
Globe associate editor
Posted September 12, 2002

While parish religious education programs and Catholic schools can reinforce faith formation of children, parents remain the primary educators of the Catholic faith.

"This comes from not only personal belief, but church teaching," said Linda Anderson, director of catechesis. "The church does put a great emphasis on the importance of families and parents as the primary educators."

The Office of Faith Formation, she added, wishes to raise awareness about this and help the parents with this task.

Anderson referred to The Catechism of the Catholic Church and what it said about the church and home.

"In our own time, in a world often alien even hostile to faith, believing families are of primary importance as centers of living radiant faith." It also states, "That is the home of the first school of Christian life and the school for human enrichment."

Dr. Stephan Davis, director of youth and intergenerational ministry, referred to the U.S. bishops' document titled Follow the Way of Love.

The document states, "Your daily life is a true expression of church."

It lists the different elements of church. Davis pointed out that many of these elements primarily start in the home. For instance, parents form the image of God for their children and make disciples of their children.

"Children learn their spirituality from what they see in their parents," he said. "All the elements are expressions of my spirituality - prayer, how I behave toward others, a sense of mission to help others and sense of gratitude."

Kay Morrissey, director of adult and family ministries, agreed that children learn by example.

"Our children learn primarily by what they see us do and what we involve them in - daily prayer, grace before meals, service to others, attending church as family and being involved in parish life," she said.

She used the analogy of children having a backpack of faith formation.

"Our role as parents is to keep giving them experiences in formation and prayer life that packs their backpack. As adults, they will make their individual choices, but they can unpack that backpack and this will help them make informed decisions," said Morrissey.

If they stray, they have a solid foundation on which to return.

Along with setting good examples such as treating people with respect and attending Mass regularly, parents can help their children learn in a variety of ways.

The General Directory of Catechesis states, "The childhood religious awakening which takes place in the family is simply irreplaceable. It is most powerful when parents take the time to explain to their children the religious significance or meaning of certain events including holy days and family moments, and of social, political or moral questions."

Anderson pointed out that by parents could help their children learn about the faith through such things as reading having access to Scripture in the home and sharing Bible stories or songs with them.

She would even encourage parishes to present a particular grade - say fourth grade - with an age-appropriate Bible every year so families have one in their homes. In some cases, the only Bible some homes have is one used more for decoration than is actually read.

Children may also benefit from values based, character building stories such as the Chronicles of Narnia.

"My wife and I were home schoolers, so one of the things we tried to create was an educational environment in our home. Everything in there is oriented toward educating our children. That is the same thing with our faith -everything is oriented toward developing faith in our children," said Davis. "What they see on the walls, what they hear from our mouths and what we read are all there, purposely to engender and grow faith."

Monitoring television programs may be a good idea. Some children can handle certain situations better than others, noted Anderson. If a child has a propensity for getting into fights, certain programs should be avoided.

"You need to know your children well enough to know how much you need to monitor," she said. "Some children need more protections, but at the same time you cannot isolate them."

In the Davis home, they tightly control what their children are exposed to. He doesn't like the fact that television provides such a passive influential. When they do watch television the family discusses the moral issues at stake, and such things as which character they want to be like or not be like.

"My job is to protect my children's innocence so they can develop as they are supposed to develop," he said.

Not knowing what information children will pick up outside of the home makes communication and positive reinforcement of Christian values all the more important, stressed Davis.

Parents must also communicate with their children the importance to strive for Christ-like behavior.

"Kids really need help in developing and making good choices and developing a sense of right and wrong," said Anderson. "Things are not always black and white."